


Whales, Rolls, and Stretch Marks

by vkdemon



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M, References to Suicide, Underage Drinking, sizist language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-18
Updated: 2012-03-18
Packaged: 2017-11-14 18:31:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/518251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vkdemon/pseuds/vkdemon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sebastian does not find Dave attractive. He realizes some emotions run deeper then skin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Whales, Rolls, and Stretch Marks

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Birthday Kayla!

Dave was not attractive. It was a simple fact. He was fat, squishy in all the wrong places and his good features like those massive arm muscles were covered up by the horrible baggy Letterman. His big smile was overshadowed his strange manicured arching eyebrows, to say nothing about  the circle of his chin that reminded Sebastian of overweight American warnings. David was just so Middle America. So much a stereotype of the perfect republican son meat and potatoes family man complete with the layer of chub right at the middle that imagining sex with Dave induced the urge to retch.  
  
In summary he did not want to fuck David Karofsky.   
  
Which was perfect you see because Sebastian was trying to change. He never took back his opinion, they were true as the day he'd said them. But he had apologized for the mean tone. Yes David was unattractive. That didn't mean he was unattractive to everyone. Proof in point was the College age middling looks Italian with a stetson who'd pulled Dave onto the scandals dance floor.   
  
The man was obviously enjoying the extra padding. He was touching it enough. Dave was smiling and seemed to be enjoying himself. Well congrats. He would congratulate David when he came back from the dance floor. Whenever that was, seeing as this was song number 3.  
  
Sebastian did not want to fuck David Karofsky. His mind supplied him with flashes of whales, rolls, and stretch marks.  
  
Sebastian was a better person now that he was around Dave. This was normal, coming to scandals, sharing a drink and a talk. Dave would talk about his crush on Kurt, the hockey games he watched, the college he was angling for. Sebastian would joke, comment and generally support Dave with as few belittling remarks as he could manage. Sebastian didn't talk about himself much, but when he did Dave would listen, be warm and kind and somehow able to see the good side of every moment. It was shocking what nearly dying did to a man. David seemed to see life with this beautiful, silver lining like a man finally released from prison with his life ahead of him. And sometimes Sebastian could see it too. That the world was actually filled with more joy then bitterness. Only sometimes.  
  
A man of a vague, unattractive size and shape wandered toward him. It really didn't matter how smooth the guy's line. He was too stocky for Sebastian and a bit too long in the tooth. Sebastian bit his lip, conjuring the image of Dave's world view: find the silver lining. He then opened his mouth.   
  
"I'm here with a friend. Thanks for the interest. I love hearing I'm hot stuff."   
  
When the man laughed a little and walked off, the low rumble of Dave's voice came to the spot on the bar stool to his right. "You're getting better."  
  
"I couldn't think of anything particularly evil to say." Sebastian was not smiling warmly. He'd never admit to it. "How was your dance?"  
  
"Fun... a little scary."  
  
"He pull some moved on you cubby?"  
  
"He asked me to the bathroom."  
  
"Damn. Dave your first bathroom hook-up. Salut!"   
  
"I didn't say yes!" Dave's round face lit up in a beautiful grin.   
  
"You should have. Bathroom hook-ups are some of the best sex you'll experience. It's all pheromone rush and need without any aftermath worries." Sebastian licked his lips, wondering if he should scope out someone for that exact experience.  
  
"Firsts are important."  
  
"Why do I feel another 'agree to disagree' and 'look at Sebastian like he's missing a piece of his soul' conversations?"  
  
"There's nothing wrong with it. Personally I want to have my first be in a bed, with a man I love who loves me. Or at least cares for me and knows my last name."  
  
"Karofsky. It's a mouthful. Your poor, imaginary lover might have an easier time sucking your cock down to the base."  
  
"As if. You don't even know how big I am, Bast." Dave took a drink of his beer, letting Sebastian steer them away from the conversation of vastly opposing views.  
  
He did not want to fuck David Karofsky and Dave didn't want to be fucked.  
  
~  
  
Another night together with alcohol, this one at Dave's house. The apartment was large enough for a man and his son to live. One room that was now a gym, one room for an office and two bedrooms. A divorce does that. It shakes up your life, packs up your memories and starts on new ones.   
  
The room Dave was in was not his old one, not the one with the sturdy beam in the closet. Dave was more then happy for that. He was sitting against his bed, Sebastian sprawled on top of it as they played COD. Sebastian seemed to like the World War Two era best, he'd come off with little historical details. Dave loved he had someone who could talk with that was also a history nerd.   
  
This friendship with Sebastian was nice, really damned nice. It wasn't filled with all the past and guilt that Kurt's friendship was. Sebastian never placed a hand on his arm and asked ever so tentatively if he was 'feeling okay'. He didn't even try to treat Dave like a breakable thing. He was blunt, abrasive and just... himself.   
  
"So dad rented Rent for 'family night'."  
  
"Adam Pascal is hot. I want to grab that long hair and just bite his neck."  
  
"Disturbing."  
  
"But hot."  
  
"No..."  
  
"Liar." Sebastian laughed, that wicked smile bright and real. "So you two watched?"  
  
"Yeah. It was strange, kind of fun thought. I might be starting to understand Kurt's obsession with musicals."   
  
"Trust me those are nothing like the musicals Gay-Face watches. Try hyper-idealized romanticism and oppressive contrived storylines."  
  
"No lost love for musicals I take it?" Dave had long since stopped trying to get Sebastian to not insult Kurt. Dave figured that he'd work on it after Sebastian got over his interest in Blaine.   
  
"It's all about romance and the first kiss. It's crap. Stories like that are horribly boring and wrong."  
  
"How so?"  
  
"Once you get into sex you'll understand. It's all about the pull and draw between two characters. This underlying tension that neither will act on for whatever plot reason. And once they do, it's an explosion of need and then the movie ends. It's not love, those couples aren't in love. They're in lust. I've felt that, the draw, the sensation of falling, of wanting so badly to just be near someone."  
  
"Blaine." Dave tried not to realize his voice was a little bitter. It seemed the world of attractive men wanted Blaine.  
  
"One of many, but yes. I'm drawn to him, I want to touch him, and lick him, and--"  
  
"Jesus okay back off the details there. I do _not_ need images."  
  
"Don't you?" Sebastian purred and Dave wanted to punch him. Sebastian was all kinds of hot and knew it. He wore "Too Hot For You" like a uniform. He rolled over on Dave's bed, now on his back, reaching toward the ceiling as if his arms were wrapping around the shoulders of his imaginary lover. "Just think about that guy you want, Kurt, how he draws you and how the sensation of touch, a kiss would cause a fire across your skin, make you arch and beg for him."  
  
Dave's eyes were intense, able to picture it clearly, but Kurt wasn't here. Sebastian was the one on his bed, the one with the arching back and the bedroom voice. "Bast: stop."  
  
"The taste of his tongue against yours..."  
  
" _Sebastian_!" Dave voice is a growl, a clear sign of a line being crossed.  
  
Instantly Sebastian sits up, his voice returning to normal. "It's lust. Nothing but pheromones and nothing to keep them together. It's a lie to make it anything more then that."  
  
"Yeah. You're some great moral compass for pointing that out."  
  
"Yes I am. I'm honest. Otherwise you pine for a Hollywood lie. Pathetic." The bitterness is obvious and more than once, again, he wonders why Sebastian thinks that. Who broke that dream for Sebastian. Faster then he can ask Sebastian switches topics. "You just keep dreaming, Davey bear. Maybe you'll get the real fairytale."  
  
"Hungry?" And like a truce, they stopped talking about it.   
  
"Famished."  
  
~  
  
"How about this one?" Sebastian was once again on Dave's bed, a Game Informer opened casually before him. He was currently helping Dave pick out an attractive outfit for his first ever real date. Sebastian had set Dave up with some bi-curious warbler. In Sebastian's opinion Trent had far too much sass to be straight and they were both rotund so he figured Dave had a good chance of scoring. Win-win.   
  
"It's fine."  
  
"Dammit, Bast! You'd said the exact same thing to the last five outfits."  
  
"It's all the same opinion Dave. If you wanted a 'Fem eye for the bear guy' then Gay-Face should be here."  
  
"Hell no. I don't want Kurt dragging me to a mall for untold hours." Dave grunted and stared at himself in the mirror, the blue shirt too baggy to be flattering.  
  
"Not tight enough."   
  
Sebastian watched as Dave got into yet another shirt. This one fit properly but there was the problem. It stretched across his broad shoulders but also across his belly. It emphasized his size which Sebastian thought was a tragedy. No one was going to want to ride Dave like that. Sebastian flipped a page on the magazine and held his tongue. No need to go pointing out the negative and shaking Dave's confidence. A few minutes of silence and Dave was back leaning into his closet sans shirt.  
  
Sebastian watched the pull of muscle over his shoulder blades, the small of Dave's back that Sebastian's hand would easily fit three of his hand on. Maybe if Dave never turned around he could get a man. Of course that would make him the bottom. He bit his lip yet again.   
  
"I should just stay home. This isn't going to work." Dave slumped into the bed beside Sebastian miserable.   
  
The warbler sighed at the dramatics. "You'll be fine. It's not your body he's going to care about anyway."  
  
"Then why am I even trying to dress up?"  
  
"Because he needs to get beyond the package and to the good parts."  
  
David went very quiet for a moment. Sebastian could see the memory in those honey eyes and instantly wanted to take his words back. He never lied to Dave. He's apologized, but never recanted. It was true. He didn't think Dave was hot by any stretch of the imagination and couldn't see why Trent would. But that wasn't what was important.   
  
"Dave he's not going to want to jump you when you walk in. But give him a half hour and that smile, and he'll be begging you to wear his ring."  
  
"Fine... I'm going."  
  
"There's a good bear cub." Dave threw one of the shirts at him and Sebastian saw that smile he'd been talking about. The one that made even Sebastian want to be the kind of man who could give Dave the romance he seemed to crave.  
  
~  
  
Warblers practice Monday had turned into a war-zone. No one was sure where it had started, but somewhere between doo wop's and choreography, the topic of Trent's weekend had come up. Now the Sebastian and Trent were toe-to-toe giving neither an inch. Sebastian's remarks had turned continually toward Trent and Dave's weight. Finally Trent snapped.  
  
"You're just jealous because you turned him down and now I've got the big, buff bear all to myself." Trent threw the gauntlet. "Oh what's wrong? Didn't think Dave and I had shared our mutual stories yet? We are way past that."  
  
"I do not want to fuck David! He's fat, insecure, and has stretch marks." Sebastian lost control, his voice rough as it provided the counter argument.  
  
"You know I feel bad for you Sebastian. You're never going to have a chance at the man who rocked my world because you're obsessed with looks. He is a fine piece of man and your sizist self can go sit and spin."  
  
"Better then getting crushed to death."  
  
"You keep telling yourself that boy. Meanwhile I'm going to keep having the time of my life with one fine slice of bear cub."  
  
~  
  
That night Sebastian had some pale thin twink up again the Scandals bathroom wall. The man was writhing in his hands, his perfect neck tilted back open for Sebastian to make his mark on. He was handsome, had a defined jawline, wide, brown eyes that looked so innocent, and a responsive body. He had just enough muscle to be all man as his shirt fell to the ground. Sebastian dropped to his knees, surreptitiously slipping a condom over the length before his eyes before sinking his mouth on it. No need to get herpes from a quick Scandals fuck.   
  
The man was average and thin, matching his body. He began to bob on the length, the man's sounds like so many others: breathy, needy, empty. The man couldn't even give him a moan containing Sebastian's name seeing as they'd exchanged about 5 words, none of it being an introduction.   
  
Soon the man's hand was wrapped around him, pumping steadily. The man was making him race toward the finish-line. It was good, as always it felt. He came and he never noticed the man leave. Sebastian buttoned up his pants, the afterglow leaving him relaxed and somehow sad. He closed his eyes as he washed his hands. Rolls and stretchmarks entered his mind, Dave's body flushing as Trent's small plump mouth kissed along his broad shoulders. He could almost hear Dave's happy little chuckle at the attention. He'd be shy, unsure of Trent's real attraction. Trent would reassure him with some comment, some compliment. How Dave's smile drew him like a moth, how Dave's shoulders were so broad and his muscle begged to be bit. His hands so large they could wrap around the back of Sebastian's neck and hold him secure as they kissed.   
  
His eyes snapped open. No...No, no, no, no! He was not imagining himself as Dave's man! He didn't want to fuck Dave!  
  
~  
  
Another Saturday afternoon at Dave's and Sebastian was irritated. He avoided sitting on the bed, too many images had assaulted his casual thoughts this weekend to even conceive of being comfortable on the furniture. It looked freshly cleaned but no doubt it still held the scent of sweat and sex from the two men. Depending on how far they'd gotten it was probably slick with lube. His nose wrinkled at the image of Trent's roundness slinging against Dave's hair chest.   
  
"I hear you scored." Sebastian's words were completely out of place in the conversation of pre-teens on MMORPG's.  
  
"Um.. Yeah. Trent and I had a great time. Thanks for hooking us up."  
  
"Now you'll have a buddy for the all-you-can-eat buffet night at Breadstix." Sebastian snapped at Dave.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Won't it be just the most adorable ceremony? Matching Big and Large tuxes and matching Diabetes risk."  
  
"Get out."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Get out, Sebastian." Dave's voice was low and controlled. He stood and opened the door. "I'm not sure why you've decided you need to attack me, but I'm not going to deal with it. Go home, sort yourself out, and we'll talk tomorrow about what's bothering you."  
  
"I was joking, Dave, calm down on the diva fit. Being gay doesn't mean becoming a Diva li--"  
  
" _Out_ , Sebastian!"  
  
~  
  
"I'm sorry." Five Days later Sebastian finally called Dave.   
  
"Your forgiven. What was going on?"  
  
"I got in a fight." Dave's only response and a soft encouraging sound. "With your paramour."  
  
"He told me, but wasn't that Monday?"   
  
"Does it matter? I went to Scandals and found someone to...."  
  
"Details spared, please." Dave responded automatically, as he had each time Sebastian spoke about his hook ups.  
  
"Why do you do that?."  
  
"You're avoiding the conversation Bast."  
  
"Indulge me. Why do you stop me from describing my exploits? The men I'm with are sure to be your type. I have high standards."  
  
"This conversation is not about my communication issues Bast. Why did you start in on the size remarks?"  
  
"Answer me and I'll answer you."  
  
"I don't want to think about you having sex."  
  
"But I'm an Adonis! Everyone should want a piece of me, even vicariously."  
  
"How about the face that it reminds me of how little chance I have with you and any guy who looks like you!" Dave growled this time. Good, someone else should be vulnerable if Sebastian had to be.   
  
"I couldn't stop thinking about you and Trent fucking."  
  
"Wha?"  
  
"Mouth closed, bear cub, or you'll catch flies. I think about you having sex."  
  
"Must no be pleasant." Sebastian could hear Dave's body slumping forward.  
  
"It shouldn't be...but I've been masturbating to it for the last week. Not that specifically, but you. Your smile, the way you sway when you're excited, your stupid obsession with xkcd and that tongue that darts out when you're concentrating on a kill. I think about the way you blush and how you talk about the future like it's a good thing to look forward to. I don't want to fuck you David. I am not attracted! But for some reason I want to be the one kissing you, making you smile, laughing while we cuddle naked. I want to be the one going on dates and laughing at your dry humor. I want to be the one loving you."  
  
The seconds ticked past as they breathed into the mic. Sebastian's heart was beating out of his chest, the blurted confession rattling around on the phone line, finally out of his confused brain. He closed his eyes tight, not sure what would come on the other side of the phone.   
  
"Sebastian... come over in about 20 minutes?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"Fine."  
  
~  
  
Dave set down the phone. Sebastian just confessed his love...laced with insults, jealousy, and defensiveness, but he had confessed. Dave groaned and flopped back onto his bed. Why was he always attracted to the most dramatic of men?  
  
So Sebastian was in love..and it was freaking the one-night-stand king out. Dave shut his eyes. He needed to figure out his own feelings. He and Trent weren't exclusive. The first date had gone well and they had made out outside the restaurant, but he wasn't attached or anything. Still he needed to make sure he clean that up first. He called.  
  
"Trent for the talking!" The perky warbler answered.  
  
"Hey it's Dave."  
  
"Hello gorgeous." Dave was already blushing. "Dying to hear my voice again?"  
  
"I... um..."   
  
"Oh dear. Awkward time. What's up? I'm a big boy I can take whatever it is."  
  
"I don't think I'll be calling for that second date. I'm sorry."  
  
A small intake of breath betrayed the steadiness of Trent's next words. "Too bad Dave. Got another fish on the hook?"  
  
"Um... sort of..."   
  
"Sebastian?" Trent must have taken Dave's distressed shocked sputter as an answer. "Thought he might be angling for you. He was in full high bitch form that day. He never got that flustered even about Blaine."  
  
"Yeah. He... sort of confessed to me over the phone."  
  
"Do you want him?"  
  
Dave paused, thinking it over. Did he want Sebastian? When he approached Sebastian in scandals it was based purely on his looks. He wanted to dance with the hot guy and that was it. Now thought he knew Bast for who he really was. "He's pretty vicious when he wants to be. He's selfish and entitled all to hell. He's really funny and always supportive when I need to talk."  
  
"Right, You've got him pegged on good and bad there. Question is do you want that and all of it?"  
  
"I think so. I think...I feel more confident around him. And I think I'm good for him too."  
  
"Well then get him. Stay firm, make sure he knows this if a relationship and not a quick lay. Remember: be strict!"  
  
"Thanks Trent. I am sorry we didn't get more of a chance."  
  
"I'll have a Cherry Garcia and a movie night with Nick and Jeff and I'll be right as rain."  
  
"Night Trent."  
  
"Good Luck Dave."  
  
~  
  
Sebastian stood in Dave's room, just like he had for so many days before his realization. This time a terrible tension coiled inside of him. It clawed and ripped at his throat. He stood stripped bare despite his uniform. He was in love and David knew it. After so many words about love being fake he stood here as the first to confess to the shameful emotion. Dave was just standing there, waiting, watching, probably judging him. The little skeptic falling in love. It must be some grand cosmic joke. He searched Dave's face, praying to see it as he once had.  
  
Dave's cheeks were full and soft, perfect for petting, for his lips to lay kiss after kiss onto. His thin arched eyebrows were drawn toward each other in worry. Sebastian wanted to smooth the tension, trace the this lines of hair with his finger tips before pushing his hands into Dave's hair. Dave's broad shoulders were lined with strength, he could probably easily pick Sebastian up and pin him to the wall. Dave's round tummy was probably sensitive, receptive to traveling fingers and his tongue, and perfect for warmth and comfort of Dave's cuddles after their fun. He could find not a shred of Dave to be unattractive. Each part thrilled him and drew him. He was so screwed.  
  
"Here's how it's going to work." Dave's voice was tense. "I'm not a one-night-stand and I won't be used as one. I want a relationship, dates, meet the parents officially, the whole nine yards. I want to be in love and even if it crashes and burns horribly I still want to try. No cheating."  
  
"Agreed." Sebastian shocked himself at how easy those terms sounded.   
  
"That's it? No fight, no bargaining, no trying to get out of what you said?"  
  
"I've been doing that with myself since I realized what I was thinking. It's doomed, trying to resist this. I want to be your love."  
  
"What about sex? I don't want...I don't think I can deal with my boyfriend thinking I'm a fat fuck."  
  
"Let me prove it to you. If I'm confident about one thing it's at my ability to rock your world." Sebastian smirked, his old bravado showing, though his voice had dropped, softened. Sebastian finally approached Dave to cup his cheek he let all of his walls down. "And that you will and have rocked mine."  
  
"Wow...that's really corny."  
  
Sebastian rolled his eyes and shut up his man with a searing kiss.   



End file.
